Her Hope
by Abarero
Summary: Renji thought he'd seen every face that Rukia had. But now, in just the span of a month, he was being shown so many more. (Ichigo x Rukia- Oneshot)


Author's Notes: Random Bleach fic! Okay, I blame this all on my love of Ichigo/Rukia and Renji's line in episode 23 (which is the first line of the story here). So I crash-coursed on the manga (reading chapters 64-170 all in a day) and then once I felt a-okay on writing these characters, I wrote it out.

This is mainly from Renji's perspective-kind of a smattering of thoughts, but it's about Rukia and her relationship with Ichigo.

Enjoy!

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**Her Hope**

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_How many days has it been since I've seen her face so alive…_

Abarai Renji was certain he'd seen every face that Kuchiki Rukia possessed.

The determined face she shown that moment they'd met. Those moments of laughter and smiles as children studying to become Shinigami.

He knew all those faces.

The one of apology when she told him she was being adopted by the Kuchiki family. The one of sorrow that seemed to haunt her eyes for all those years after Kaien-dono was gone.

He thought he'd seen every face that Rukia had. But now, in just the span of a month, he was being shown so many more.

_Sympathy.__ Friendship. The feeling of closeness._

Emotions she'd sealed away hundreds of years before. Emotions she'd forgotten for the sake of being a Kuchiki. Emotions that she'd suppressed after Kaien-dono's death.

There they were in her eyes. Not only resonating firmly, but with that _stupid_ human expression on her face as well.

For Rukia, for her face to be that caught up in emotion, it was impossible. Not only had Renji never seen those expressions, but he never even thought they could exist.

She was Rukia. _Kuchiki _Rukia. A nobody like him who had the great honor of being adopted into an elite family.

There was no way she could have such a _human_ expression on her face.

He could remember how bitter he felt at that moment. For some human to dare doing that to Rukia- he would kill him for it. Not only for taking Rukia's powers away but for changing her face into something he, Abarai Renji, didn't recognize.

Defiance had been there before, but _never_ defiance against a Vice-Captain.

_Why was she standing up for these humans?_

Then that mysterious orange-haired man appeared, and her face revealed another expression he'd never seen.

_Panic.__ Concern. Fondness._

Renji knew immediately then who the man was and attacked without remorse.

Ichigo.

That was the man's name, Renji discovered. But he discovered that the only reason he remembered the name was because of the way Rukia's panicked voice screamed it. The look on her face as she desperately tried not to run out to his sprawled body on the ground.

Looking up to Rukia that moment before he dealt Ichigo a fatal blow, Renji faltered.

That look, that expression, was yet another he'd never seen.

Rukia looked terrified. Not for her own fate which lay before her in Soul Society, but for that human's. Each drop of Ichigo's blood that hit the pavement seemed only to cause more pain and sorrow to enter Rukia's eyes.

She was pleading with those eyes.

_Ichigo__, run away.__ Save yourself. Don't concern yourself with me and run._

How many faces did Rukia have that he hadn't seen?

Renji felt a tinge of bitterness seep into his heart, what was it about this man that caused Rukia to change so much? What made Ichigo so extraordinary to make her run forward then and try and hold his arm back before he could deal the final blow with Zabimaru?

And after Captain Kuchiki's attack, she still persisted.

She wanted- no, _needed_, to go to Ichigo's side.

Renji stopped her.

He wanted to knock some sense into her. He wanted her to see that if she even touched the human's body she would only have to suffer more punishment.

He wanted her to go back to being the Rukia he knew.

But she wouldn't.

Her face would forever be laced with sorrow from that moment onward. Not because of her sentence. But because Ichigo's dead body was laying there before her and she couldn't say goodbye.

For one brief moment, hope swelled back into those eyes. Renji followed her gaze to see that the human was still struggling to live.

That was the last time he'd seen her face alive. The last time she'd dared to hope. The last time she allowed any emotion through before putting back on that façade of the heartless Kuchiki family.

In that moment, Renji understood everything.

Casually, he joked; telling the human that he just didn't know when to give up.

"Just lay there and die quietly."

He had to help Rukia with her lie. He had to help Rukia if this was the path she was to choose. He had to help keep her last shred of hope alive. And her hope- was that reckless, orange-haired boy.

She would hide her tender goodbyes behind a mask of indifference. But her tears couldn't be hidden as she walked away and left him there, never knowing once she crossed the threshold back into Soul Society whether the boy would live or die.

Now, she was a prisoner awaiting her death, and her face continued to be somber.

Renji knew, she never regretted those months spent with the human boy. If anything, she regretted dragging the boy into her problems so much that his life was the payment.

This was the second time Rukia felt as if she'd killed the one that had meant most to her. First Kaien, then Ichigo. And Renji couldn't help but feel sorry for her.

The days passed and the reports began. Intruders- some reckless band of five who'd tried to breach the gate. One of them was rumored to be an orange-haired shinigami.

Renji knew then what he must do. He joined the group of four set to lead her to the Shine of Penitence, and hoped his actions wouldn't seem too suspicious.

Rukia stood there, her lifeless face looking out the small window at the place where she would die. They all left her there, turning to leave.

But Renji turned back, leaning up against her frail form and whispering into her ear.

"I'll tell you one unconfirmed report," He glanced back to make sure no one was listening in, "You know some ryoka entered Soul Society yesterday, right? There were five. They say one of them was an orange-haired shinigami with a sword as tall as he was."

She turns then, not a word from her lips- but just a gasp of surprise. Searching, she looks into Renji's gaze- making sure he's not joking like when they were children.

He closes his mouth and allows the slightest of smiles onto his face.

_What is it about that Ichigo that can light her face up like this?_

Turning, he walks to where the others wait. The door closes, and Rukia is alone.

_Alone, yes._ Renji thinks to himself solemnly, _But__ her hope has been restored._

Walking around the buildings, he keeps thinking this over. Wishing he'd had the chance to find out just what about this Ichigo captured Rukia's heart.

_It was Ichimaru who intercepted them. That kid's dead for sure now, but…_

Stopping, he looks back to the tower. Rukia's hopeful eyes still etched in his memory.

…_it's probably better that I didn't tell her that._

Eyebrows furrowing in thought, he hears a voice calling him, but ignores it for a brief moment.

_Let Rukia hope.__ Hope that he's still alive and coming to save her. Hope that her love won't end again in tragedy._


End file.
